The Emotional Cross-Fit of Facebook, Algorithmic Manipulation, and the Search for Authentic Connection in a Mirror Maze of Service Level De-optimization
A Decade Under the Shadow of Facebook: An Agonizing Influence on An Already Agonized Life
Originally published in April 2023
This lands with Lone Raversince it tells the stories of times that the records require but which, some days, I’d prefer to forget. And so would Mark Zuckerberg.
And I no longer am attempting to blot it all out that this actually happened.
- Lone Raver is the story inspired by events in my life and perspectives gained from growing up in LA County in the early 1980s, moving to the high desert of southern California sometime after the 1984 Olympics, and growing up a weirdo in an area of California that’s more like Oklahoma than some parts of Oklahoma.
- And the mid-90s to late 2000s rave scene, way more fun than the current psychedelic whatever it is.
- And then the aftermath of it all for me: the that, and the other thing, and the moving to Boston, and the moving back to California to LA and then up to Big Bear, and then up to the SF Bay, and then back down, and finally, well, you get the idea.
This letter is the organized, edited for your enjoyment pre-writing that contextualizes Lone Raver and SparkleDeep — going deep with the sincerely unique— and also contains more on travel, good food, amazing people to learn from, the most remarkable vistas, and things that don’t fit elsewhere.
I’m going into this all, because this is brand-new for me, relaunching my communication strategy, so yeah, it’s a chance to share how it’s going, and I’m not saying to go over there, right now — not at all, haha — but there are two other newsletters, and they might have separate audiences, though I believe you will also find them interesting.
Now, get ready for an experience.
I. The Early Days
About two years before I was arrested in 2009, I opened a Facebook account. I was nearly never on any social media, I didn’t understand Twitter, at all, and Tribe.net had fizzled, as had Friendster. I couldn’t see myself getting hooked on another social site that was going to go under.
Facebook, the social media giant that has connected billions of people, also left a trail of personal and social consequences in its wake.
In that second year, there was that relationship that ended due to the strategic use of the Poke button by someone who no doubt saw her act as some kind of justice, pretty sure that was the second year I had a Facebook account.
First year, there was an excruciating relationship status fumbling through what to do, about a year before that, and probably had something to do with why I procured an account in the first place: wanting to keep up with the Jones’ and, well, my date’s last name might have rhymed with that, so it would be literally and otherwise true that I acquired a Facebook account to keep up with someone whose last name rhymes with Jones.
II. Superficial Connections Era (2011-2013)
During the period from 2011 to 2013, Facebook became the primary means of socializing for me. I had moved to Boston for my post-MBA job, and didn’t really have time – or much inclination – to meet new friends. I knew I would be sentenced in a few months, and while the count I pled to had a maximum sentence of four years, four years was still a long time.
In some ways, looking back, 4 years, I’m not sure how I would have been after a 4-year stint – a 4-year “bid” one of the bunkmates I had at a men’s halfway house would have said; he was in for bank robbery. I think I met more bank and pharmacy robbers than anybody else. Plenty of fraudsters. And then there was the odd clandestine chemist; that was me.
When I moved to Boston, I opened a new Facebook account and let my heart be my guide. It was entertaining to see all the things people shared, and to be open about what I posted, which wasn’t much. But I made friends. Real friends that I even got to know in IRL — at least for a few years. While it allowed for easy connections with others, it also led to the fact the only friends I had were people I didn’t really know. I did see a lot of people making fools of themselves, but that was part of the attraction of 2012 Facebook, I suppose? A cross-section of people outdoing the last person’s foolishness for attention, which resulted in absolutely superficial and shallow relationships.
III. The Acrimonious Troll Farm-Induced Civil War of Online 2015-2016
The rise of troll farm activity in 2015 and 2016 resulted in an online civil war that wreaked havoc on Facebook. It felt like a battlefield to me, as a transgender person in 2015 and 2016, and most of the harmful postings were friends of people who had larger followings.
The spread of misinformation and divisive content led to increased animosity between users and amplified existing social and political tensions. We all know what happened next.
For me, that began several years of uncertain housing, living around the Bay Area, then living in Long Beach for 2018, which was refreshing to be in one place for a full year. During that year, a lot happened. It was about May when I noticed I had an unreasonably strong attachment to someone I had only met, once, and who didn’t seem that interested. It was a bizarre situation, but helped me see how atypical my emotions and attachment mechanisms were askew.
IV. The 2018 Messenger Morning Texting Fiasco
In 2018, Facebook’s Messenger app became the center of controversy in my mind when a certain user began receiving unsolicited and inappropriately timed messages from a very well-known sender.
This situation highlighted for me how tricky some of the user interface design was, nudging me to do the thing I wanted to do. How did it know? And why did it have to flash it in my face when this person was active. And it seemed she was active when I was active. It was a match made in heaven. She didn’t always answer. But often times, she did. She never did say anything about my messages being too early or late.
V. From Algorithmic Meddling to the Mirror Maze of Customer Support, Today
As Facebook’s algorithms have evolved, so too have the way users interact with the platform. Today, we see a trickle of content curated and controlled by algorithms, leading to a loss of authenticity and individual control.
This meddling has left users questioning the platform’s intentions and the role it plays in shaping our online experience.
It always feels to me like I’m being put through a ringer. Like contorted around for some purpose that I am supposed to believe is reasonable — but certainly does not feel reasonable.
IV. Holding Facebook Accountable
Despite the damage caused by troll farms and other issues, Facebook has faced limited consequences. While the company has been fined for various offenses, such as the 2019 $5 billion FTC settlement related to privacy violations, many argue that these penalties have not been sufficient to hold the platform accountable for the full extent of its influence on our lives.
And two days before the Christmas Holiday of 2022 — so not exactly a time of year people are even paying much attention to the news — Facebook was fined $725 million of its role in data breach related to Cambridge Analytica.
So if you want to know the cost Facebook paid for the data breach associated with the tumultuous 2015-2016 which ended up with an election that didn’t turn out as the pollsters expected, it was $725 million.
Summing It Up: Too big too fail social media?
Over the past decade, Facebook’s influence on my life and the lives of countless others has been undeniably significant. However, the platform’s negative impact, from invasive features and superficial connections to algorithmic meddling and the rise of troll farms, has left many questioning the true cost of our new dependence on this social media behemoth.
As we go forward, it is essential to hold Facebook accountable for its actions and to critically assess the role it plays in our society.
Should a population be able to be taken hostage by their emotions, by a company of any kind, in order to sell advertising and make money?
That’s up for us to choose. But seems totally okay, to everyone concerned, so far.
And Cambridge Analytica? Who are they again?
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